...and once every so often I'll see a girl in a crowd, similar to myself in age, height and build. All blonde hair and smiles. Sometimes she laughs unashamed at something her friend says and other times she talks, mouth full of food, as a her boyfriend grins at her from across the table. It's never the same girl, never the same place, never the same scenario but I always get the same feeling. And for just one moment I pretend that she is me, at a future point in time. A version of me who has learnt not everything she touches breaks and trusts that not everyone sets out to break her. And I smile, I smile in the hope that one day I'll get there.

A little Wordsworth

Though nothing can bring back the hour

Of splendour in the grass, of glory in the flower;

We will grieve not, rather find

Strength in what remains behind;

- William Wordsworth, Ode: Intimations of Immortality

Hope most when it seems hopeless.

How desperately exhausting it is holding onto hope when it is but a tiny piece of twine supporting your entire weight as you dangle mid-air inside a dark wet hole. Bleeding hands, dead legs, aching head. You hope each day someone will pull you out but as the people pass they yell down the hole.'You okay down there?' . And instead of waiting for an answer or rescuing you they just lower a basket with a bit of bread to keep you going until tomorrow.

So what value is there in hope? Simple- Everything. But surely the better question is: 

What is the cost without it?

If there is one thing I have learnt it is you can never afford to let go of hope. Ever. Hold onto it with everything you have. Make the choice to find hope in life and when hope for a better day is too much- hope for a better hour, hope for your next breath. And as each day dawns with new possibilities you may find that the bread that kept you going another day has enabled you to put one hand in front of the other and begin your journey climbing back toward the surface.

Love,

Welcome

Dear Readers,

Welcome to my little corner of the world. Thank you for taking the time to stop by and take a look around. For those following me, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support and faith in me as I step forward and begin this next blogging adventure.

As I post about my life most particularly in relation to depression and anxiety I hope that my experiences and advice will be of some use to you- whether in your own life or as you assist in the life of another person.

I encourage and welcome any questions you may have- whether about my experiences, Christianity, depression or anxiety. If you need encouragement, resources, help supporting a friend/family member you are welcome to leave a comment, or contact me.

God bless and much love,